Skip to main content

Abuse...Defined...

It is domestic violence awareness month and I applaud all of those who have had the courage to step away from those who have been abusing them...and even those who are waiting for the chance.  I even applaud those who want to leave but at the present moment...can't...why...because they have the heart to do so but their lives may be in danger of the lives of their children...and my prayer is that the opportunity to leave will present itself...soon.  But for those who have chosen to stay for whatever reason...no applause for you...why..because you are blind to what is happening to you physically, mentally, sexually in some cases and even spiritually.  You stay because you love them...and because you think things will get better.....

Your abuser does not...love you.  Your abuser is not sorry every time they use your face as a punching bag.  Your abuser is not pitiful as he or she...may seem.  Your abuser is a monster who needs help...help you cannot give them.  Why do you think after a pitiful apology they do it again?  Why when you try to do something for yourself...they get mad?  Why when you spend time with family or friends they become jealous? Why would love...hurt?  I know when we are in love, of course those who love us can hurt us...our feelings...but they should not hurt us by the blow of their hand or the kick of their foot...they should not hurt us by spitting in our faces or on our bodies...they should not hurt us by saying hurtful things that make us cry!  THAT MY FRIENDS IS ABUSE!

What will it take to wake up?  What will it take for you to see, you are in an abusive relationship?  What will it take for you to stop saying, "but he didn't mean it", or "he was sad, going through something and just took it out on me"...REALLY?  THAT IS YOUR EXCUSE.  WAKE UP! If after being beaten you feel a sense of worthlessness...you are being abused.  If after hearing you are nothing and will never be nothing or you will never amount to anything or even...you are a bitch...a whore...someone no one else would want...you are being abused.  If when they have had a bad day come home to rape and strip you of any dignity...you are being abused.  If you know what they do and say is not right...YOU ARE BEING ABUSED!

You are more than that.  God created you to be the head...not the tail.  God created you to be above...and not beneath.  God created you as a priceless gem...not something anyone can place a price on and sell to the lowest bidder...YOU ARE MORE...THAN WHAT YOU HAVE BECOME! Do not let anyone, friend, co-worker, boss, mate..no one define who you are.  You define who you are by not accepting anyone and anything.  You define who you are by leaving that horrible situation and demanding better.  You define who you are by getting out...and getting help!  How would I know..because I too was in an abusive relationship..horrible one at that...but I got out.  With the help of friends and my godfather...I got out and was able to hide with several friends until the time was right..you can too.  No one can make you leave...your knowledge of what you are worth and what you deserve...will...

Know the warning signs...know that these people are insecure...and in themselves feel insignificant....know they may have come from a family of abuse or have been in situations that they themselves were abused...know and when the moment is right..before it is too late...GO!...until next time...



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A Time to Turn

In everyone's life there comes a time to turn.  Turn why, you ask?  Well if you have lived as long as I have, 50 years, you learn that your quality of life is much more important than your quatity of life. As you grow and develop relationships with others, at one time in your life those relationships are important to your continued growth.  But as you age, and my prayer is that you will, you learn that those relationships that at one time seemed to be beneficial to your very existence, are NO LONGER NEEDED.

When I decided to move from my hometown and live in a totally different city and state and time zone, I knew that there were some people I was saying goodbye to, for the last time.  I knew there were people who while essential to my projects and my overall well being, no longer had a place in my life.  I knew this and with a sadness, accepted it.  When I returned, I no longer had a desire to be near them or associate with them.  I had made a turn.

A turn for the better.  This …

Press In Your Pain

It has been a while since my last post but a lot has happened in and around me.  Some good, some not so good, but all came together to make me a stronger woman and for that, I am most thankful.  In the past few months I have learned how painful a press can be.  We hear that when life hands you lemons to make lemonade.  Well friends, that is easier said than done and I am sure there are a lot of you out there who agree with me.  When life hands you a lemon, most of us do not think of making lemonade rather, we think of the seeds that it contains and how sour it is to taste.  We think about how difficult it is to peel a lemon and the sting the smell can cause in your nose.  In other words we think about all of the things that make it difficult to get to that lemonade.  That my friends is process of pain.

When we are in pain and I am not talking about physical pain per say, we hurt, we ache, we are uncomfortable, and we want to be left alone to deal with that pain.  We want relief, yes, …

Watch Your "Back"

Many times when we are involved in something be it for church, school, work or even a hobby we may have, we are surrounded by people who are in support of what we are doing.  We often hear, "I've got your back", and keep it moving feeling as if nothing and no one can harm us.  That even if someone tried, those who "have" our backs, will defend us and keep anyone who wants to cause harm or stop the progression of God in our lives, away from us.  We feel confident in that, and most times don't even bat an eye.

But friends, we have to be in constant prayer as to who has our backs.  What do I mean by that? Well not everyone who says they HAVE your back should be AT your back.  Let me break it down even further.  If the person watching your back is trying to manipulate your circle, you need to change those or the one who is "backing" you.  Not everyone who says they have our backs, have our backs. Some are watching our backs only to gain entry into who…