Why Does My Skin...Scare
In light of all that has been going on and will continue to go on until real change happens, I came to know something. My skin...scares. Let me elaborate on that for a moment.
They say you only have one chance to make a good first impression but how can that be true when your first impression of me is...she scares me; he terrifies me; I feel unsafe with them around. Who are you referring to? Is there someone behind me or did someone leave that was here that you feared? Oh, oh I get it. It's me or should I say my skin that scares you. It's the tint that causes alarm. It's the presence of a person whose skin is different from yours that triggers your fear mechanism; your defense mechanism; your judgement.
The fact that you see me...not hear me...not feel me...not even take the time to get to know me but that you see me...heightens your awareness OF me. Why is that I wonder. Believe me, if you ever got to know me, talk to me, spend time in my presence you might find that I am less of threat. You may find that like you, I love opera. I enjoy the ballet. I eat in fine restaurants. I dream of going to the Kentucky Derby one day. You may find that I am intelligent. That I am creative. That I am passionate about world affairs just as you are. Hey, you might even find out that I am more accepting of others than most of the people in your circle of friends, and less judgemental.
But unless you take the time to say hi. Unless you give me the benefit of the doubt. Unless you give me a chance to present myself to you AS myself, you will never know. Meanwhile you will stay in your protective bubble and keep those who wish you well outside and those who wish you harm, those people you trust and fear less...inside. You will hold on to your purse tighter when you see me inside the store shopping for the same clothing going to the same wedding as you are. You will make sure that at the bank I see nothing of your account unless I am servicing your account.
If you accidentally brush up against me you will brush off your clothing unless I am the one cleaning your clothing. You will shield your children from me unless I am the one helping to raise your children. You won't eat at the table with me unless I fixed the food you are eating. You see if I am of service to you it is ok to be near you. Ahhh there's the rub. Well let me enlighten you. I am who I am. God made me who I am just like He made you who you are. My skin may be black but it cuts the way your skin does. I have the same organs as you. I bleed the same way as you. I hurt the way you hurt. But when it comes to the heart, that is where the difference lies. You see everything starts in the heart and the bible says that out of the abundance of the heart...the mouth speaks.
Yes our hearts are both made of flesh and pump blood inside our bodies but when you are racist. When you feel superior. When you treat me as trash...as something that should be thrown away at birth. When you stop feeling love and feel hate and disgust, envy and strife...your heart is black. I hate to tell you this but when you hate me, you hate God. The bible also says that you cannot love God who you've never seen and hate man, who you see every day. It just can't be. You know a lot of times I said to myself, "if only I were white I could do this and I could become that." What I found out is that I AM THIS AND I HAVE BECOME THAT...without your approval, without your acceptance. I became who I am today because I pressed past your opinion.
In closing, it hurts me to know that my skin scares. That is gives you pause. That it puts you on the defense. It hurts to know that you would rather stomp on my neck than pat me on the back. But I also rejoice that at the end of the day...when I meet my Lord one day...that it won't matter the color of my skin. Rather what will matter is that I did good and that I will hear "well done, thy good and faithful servant." So until I pen next time, take a hard look not at the outside but inside and measure how you feel against what you see. I pray that as we move forward into change, you will change with it.
They say you only have one chance to make a good first impression but how can that be true when your first impression of me is...she scares me; he terrifies me; I feel unsafe with them around. Who are you referring to? Is there someone behind me or did someone leave that was here that you feared? Oh, oh I get it. It's me or should I say my skin that scares you. It's the tint that causes alarm. It's the presence of a person whose skin is different from yours that triggers your fear mechanism; your defense mechanism; your judgement.
The fact that you see me...not hear me...not feel me...not even take the time to get to know me but that you see me...heightens your awareness OF me. Why is that I wonder. Believe me, if you ever got to know me, talk to me, spend time in my presence you might find that I am less of threat. You may find that like you, I love opera. I enjoy the ballet. I eat in fine restaurants. I dream of going to the Kentucky Derby one day. You may find that I am intelligent. That I am creative. That I am passionate about world affairs just as you are. Hey, you might even find out that I am more accepting of others than most of the people in your circle of friends, and less judgemental.
But unless you take the time to say hi. Unless you give me the benefit of the doubt. Unless you give me a chance to present myself to you AS myself, you will never know. Meanwhile you will stay in your protective bubble and keep those who wish you well outside and those who wish you harm, those people you trust and fear less...inside. You will hold on to your purse tighter when you see me inside the store shopping for the same clothing going to the same wedding as you are. You will make sure that at the bank I see nothing of your account unless I am servicing your account.
If you accidentally brush up against me you will brush off your clothing unless I am the one cleaning your clothing. You will shield your children from me unless I am the one helping to raise your children. You won't eat at the table with me unless I fixed the food you are eating. You see if I am of service to you it is ok to be near you. Ahhh there's the rub. Well let me enlighten you. I am who I am. God made me who I am just like He made you who you are. My skin may be black but it cuts the way your skin does. I have the same organs as you. I bleed the same way as you. I hurt the way you hurt. But when it comes to the heart, that is where the difference lies. You see everything starts in the heart and the bible says that out of the abundance of the heart...the mouth speaks.
Yes our hearts are both made of flesh and pump blood inside our bodies but when you are racist. When you feel superior. When you treat me as trash...as something that should be thrown away at birth. When you stop feeling love and feel hate and disgust, envy and strife...your heart is black. I hate to tell you this but when you hate me, you hate God. The bible also says that you cannot love God who you've never seen and hate man, who you see every day. It just can't be. You know a lot of times I said to myself, "if only I were white I could do this and I could become that." What I found out is that I AM THIS AND I HAVE BECOME THAT...without your approval, without your acceptance. I became who I am today because I pressed past your opinion.
In closing, it hurts me to know that my skin scares. That is gives you pause. That it puts you on the defense. It hurts to know that you would rather stomp on my neck than pat me on the back. But I also rejoice that at the end of the day...when I meet my Lord one day...that it won't matter the color of my skin. Rather what will matter is that I did good and that I will hear "well done, thy good and faithful servant." So until I pen next time, take a hard look not at the outside but inside and measure how you feel against what you see. I pray that as we move forward into change, you will change with it.
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